A snarky Instagram comment from July just got its answer: Crystal Hefner used a podcast mic to settle an old Mansion-era score with Jon Lovitz.
Crystal Hefner has a long memory, and this week Jon Lovitz found out how long. Hugh Hefner’s widow used Tuesday’s episode of the “Lisa Guerrero Unleashed” podcast to brand the “Saturday Night Live” alum one of Hollywood’s “biggest pervs” and the Playboy Mansion’s “No. 1 customer,” per Page Six.
“He would be up there all the time,” Crystal said of Lovitz at the mansion, per Page Six. “His eyes would go front to back [looking at] all the women that walked through the door at the party.” She called him a “lurker,” added the distinctly unglamorous detail that his dog “peed all over the place,” and insisted, “I remember him. Every time, every party.” Lovitz’s rep did not respond to Page Six’s request for comment.
This was not a random shot. Per Page Six, Crystal first made the same claim about Lovitz in July, after the Emmy nominee left a scathing comment on her Instagram video describing her “regrets” about marrying Hugh. Lovitz asked, in part, “Do you regret the house he bought for you to live in, after his death? And keeping the money, after you sold it? And all the times your mother was at the mansion? And do you regret all he did for you?” Asked about those comments at the time, Crystal told the Daily Mail that Lovitz had been the “biggest customer,” per Page Six.
Her position, then and now, is more nuanced than the headline label. Per Page Six, she clarified that she did not have “ill will” toward Lovitz, but found it “disappointing to see someone who spent time enjoying that environment criticize a woman for speaking honestly about her own life.” She also pushed back on how her marriage gets summarized: “People often reduce my marriage to assumptions about financial benefit, but that overlooks the reality of what I experienced.”
The marriage itself remains the story’s gravity well. Crystal wed the Playboy founder in 2012, when she was 26 and he was 86, and they stayed together until his death in 2017 at age 91, per Page Six. She has since written about her experiences in her 2024 memoir, “Only Say Good Things: Surviving Playboy and Finding Myself,” recently claimed she was “brainwashed” during the marriage, and has remarried — she wed marine biologist James Ward in April, per Page Six. Host Lisa Guerrero added her own Mansion memories on the episode, recalling other familiar faces from the party era.
Strip away the insult and what is left is a familiar post-Playboy pattern: two people who were both there, telling incompatible versions of the same parties, years after the man at the center of them can no longer tell his. Lovitz fired the first public shot in July; Crystal simply waited for a microphone with a longer memory.
The 247 Take — Feuds about the Mansion are never really about the guest list — they’re about who gets to define what those years meant, and Crystal, memoir in hand, is not ceding that job to a comment section.
Sources: Page Six
